Lost in a daydream.

I was thinking.. I'm quite a useless person actually. Not that I find myself a somebody previously, it just hasn't occurred to me that I'm a good-for-nothing.

How could I change this?

Results oriented. Probably because that's the only way I could prove my worth. Education is conveniently placed in front of me, I just had to sacrifice some of the other aspects of my life or rather, lack thereof, to education. 

"Easy! I have nothing better to do anyway!"

That has been the case for years. But recently, I realised this isn't what I want anymore. Doing well in school is important but not paramount.

I've got to be less passive in life. I want to find what excites & motivates me. I have been a slacker because being a good student doesn't entice me anymore. I wasn't even one. They were just grades resulting from my superfluous personal time.

21 is really the coming of age. So many things changed, happened.. not anything I'd expect of my very predictable life.

I wish to find my passion soon. & work to being better at it. I remember how nice it feels to be good at something you like. & I miss.